It's official. Winter is coming. And I live in Ottawa, so it's coming like a bad movie sequel. 'The Return' or 'With a Vengence', that sort of thing.
In other ominious news I realized on the bus the other day that I have a frequent thought pattern that occurs. If a few people get on the bus and I'm sitting in a seat with an empty seat beside it, I secretly hope no one will sit beside me, HOWEVER, when a whole gaggle of people get on the bus I hope only that the smelliest/grossest person doesn't sit beside me. And so, when the gaggle of people get on the bus and I see a nice, clean looking person I will create more space for them. Is this horrible? Probably. Or is it just horrible because I'm writing it out loud? Exactly.
In other news we have seen one or two of these suckers around the basement.
They scurry. It's ridiculously creepy. Every time I see one, I cover my ears subconsciously I guess because I'm afraid it's going to run up my body and into my ear where it will lay eggs and my brain will slowly degenerate and I'll die and then the scientists who get my body (oh yeah! They can take it, I don't care. Why not? I mean, once the ice cream's gone, why keep the box? The ice cream is fucking GONE), the scientists who get my body will open my brain and then the bugs will run out and up into their ears and so on and so on.
Anyway, we didn't know what they were called, these bugs, so Ciaran started calling them "scuttlebugs" which is a pretty apt name. Turns out they're house centipedes. And perhaps I've written about them before. But yeah, we call them scuttlebugs. Oh and I looked up "scuttlebug"? Turns out that in urban terminology it means "the act of placing or attempting to place one's testicles inside the anus or vagina of a female sex partner."
WOW.
We're still calling them scuttlebugs anyway.
Post a comment
